It is not the least bit uncommon for many people to hear how bad a father may have been to a child and a husband to his wife. Society is rife with this narrative that men are toxic and evil beings, whereas women, wives, MOTHERS are seen as the paragon of what it is to be a virtuous human being.
NOTHING IS FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH.
Both men and women have the ability and power to be some GREAT human being who can positively transform society and the worlds around them.
And they equally have the power to destroy as much as they can simply with their toxic presence.
MOTHERS can be JUST AS TOXIC AS FATHERS.
They are not immune from being asswipes!
However, through the conditioning of minds by repetition of phrases, such as, “A mother loves knows no bounds,” when a person does have an abusive, toxic mother, the child automatically believes that when they do get abused, it must have been because of something that they have said or did.
I know this from my own past.
It can be perhaps one of the most difficult things a person can do in their lives; cutting out your narcissistic mother from your life.
Our parents have a very important role in our life, and no matter how bad they are to us because they are our family, because they are the ones who brought us into this life, cutting them out of our life can be extremely difficult.
But there are times when you just have to cut them loose from your life.
Why allow them to keep toxifying your life and dragging you down in life when they have shown you, ever since you gained consciousness, that they have no love for you.
Love is a two way street.
But with parents, that is a street where their side is DOUBLED.
That is not arrogant to say; parents brought us all into this world.
It is their job and duty to provide for us, as they CHOSE to be parents.
In this article, I want to outline when you should cut ties with your narcissistic mother and hopefully make it easy for you to see that you are not the bad guy for not wanting to deal with a person who only wants the worst for you.
- 1 When To Cut Off Narcissistic Mother?
- 2 It Is Not Your Job To Be Your Mother’s Parent (You Are The Child)
When To Cut Off Narcissistic Mother?
1 – She Constantly Sabotages Your Dreams
This can be by saying passive-aggressive things to put doubt in your mind that “you are not good enough,” to things like deliberately giving you the wrong time for a schedule or the wrong address to a place.
This is a form of gaslighting, and what they are trying to do is make you question your own reasoning, cognition, and trust in yourself.
If they make you doubt yourself and question if you are good enough, then they can slowly and surely control your life.
Mothers like this do not care, but they give the illusion that they care by playing the “I just don’t want your heart to break if you fail at this.”
They fear that you will see your potential, and then they will lose their grip on you. As long as they can make you think you are not good enough, you will always rely on them, which is what they want.
Be careful of the “altruistic” nature of these people.
Anything “kind” with them is just a means to better control you.
2 – She Tries To Make You Feel Inferior (Especially Around Guys)
It amazes me at how these mothers can steal their daughters boyfriend.
What NONSENSE IS THAT?
These toxic mothers will constantly compare themselves to their daughters and go out of their way to make their daughters feel like they are not attractive or good enough for a relationship.
What is disgusting about this is that they know that their daughters will hold on to every word that they say, hence is why they do the former entry (say passive-aggressive stuff) to their daughters.
As long as you feel inferior to her and to life, you will never shine like the diamond you are. You will remain a dark soul whose value will never come forth.
Any person, a MOTHER nonetheless, who devalues you, needs to be cut out of your life ASAP!
3 – She Tries And Break Up Your Family
It is not uncommon for them to try and badmouth you to your own kids.
The love that some of us have for our toxic mothers astounds me.
And I know all too well that connection we have or want from them. They are our mother. We came from them; we lived INSIDE OF THEM for nine months.
That is such a BEAUTIFUL connection.
But these parasites SULLY it.
If she is now trying to infect your kids into thinking YOU are not a good mother or father, when you know 10000% what a bad mother/parent looks like…that has to be the camel that breaks the back.
She destroys your childhood and is now trying to destroy YOUR parenthood.
Miss me with that nonsense.
That has to be the straw that breaks the camels back.
4 – She Never Tells You She Loves You, Despite You Telling Her
Three words are all it takes to remove doubt in our minds that maybe she doesn’t hate us, but she just has a hard time showing it.
And even with this, if a mother has a hard time showing love to her kid(s), then it is best not to pursue it.
If you can tell her you love her, and she just gives you a blank stare…that is ALL the evidence you need that SHE DOES NOT CARE ABOUT YOU.
It Is Not Your Job To Be Your Mother’s Parent (You Are The Child)
I know it isn’t easy, cutting out your mother from your life.
But for the sake of your sanity and your life, YOU DO NOT DESERVE THAT TYPE OF HATRED.
You step away from them and cut them off because once you do that, you will be able to see them for what they really are.
That distance from them will show you what they are.
Much like a hiker who moves away from a mountain can now appreciate the mountain for what it is and see it for what it is, so too will you see your toxic mother for what she is when you move away.
She is not a mountain, but a volcano getting ready to rain down HELL on you and incinerate whatever life you may have wanted to live.
Family or not, disorder or not, MOTHER or not —NO ONE HAS A RIGHT TO DESTROY YOUR LIFE.
Cut ties with them, and feel unapologetic about it.
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