A narcissist is characterized by the obnoxious, arrogant, self-absorbed behavior, superb attitude, and behavior someone displays daily. Someone with narcissistic personality disorder believes that all eyes should be on them and deserve to be admired.
A narcissistic parent, however, is a person that displays extreme possessiveness of their offspring. A narcissistic parent views their child’s independence as a threat to them. To them, their child is an extension of themselves and therefore should live the way they’re told.
These parents have unrealistic expectations of their child or children and often pin their kids against each other. The main characteristic of a narcissistic parent is the outright tendency to deny their child independence, even if they’re an adult. They don’t care if their child is 25 or 30; they should do as they’re told.
So, how exactly do you spot a narcissistic parent?
Signs Of A Narcissistic Parent
Narcissistic parents make an outright effort every day to insult and down their children. This will be done by being unreasonably critical and judgmental, invalidating any of their successes, constantly nit-picking, and invalidating emotions.
Live’s through their child
It’s normal for parents to want their child to succeed; however, narcissistic parents have their child’s whole life planned. They set expectations to fulfill their desires, dreams, and needs.
They will do whatever it takes to strip their child of their individuality, invalidating their emotions, thoughts, dreams, and goals.
You have to do as your told and become what they say before you can even do what you want.
Superiority and grandiosity
Someone suffering from NPD will naturally express how superior they treat everyone as an object used for personal gain. The unfortunate thing about having a narcissistic parent is that the kids are objectified in the same manner.
Having a superficial image
This is closely related to the display of grandiosity that narcissists have.
They display a sense of greatness in:
- Material possessions
- Physical Appearance
They display these things in such a manner that others should envy them.
This is the most common thing when it comes to having a narcissistic parent. You’re loved conditionally, and you’re treated according to how they think you faired.
Prime examples of manipulation are:
- Why can’t you be as smart as your sister?
- You WILL get straight A’s this year.
- If you don’t study business, don’t expect me to pay
- You’re so ungrateful; I do everything for you
Lack of empathy
This is the most common thing when it comes to narcissistic parents. They lack empathy and are unable to be mindful of their kids.
The thoughts and emotions of their child don’t matter to them; the only important thing is how they feel.
Touchy and inflexible
Once a narcissistic parent discovers that they won’t always pull the string and control their child. They become aggressive and insulting to get their way.
This is an unfortunate situation but one of the most common things to happen. Co-dependent relationships are most common in narcissistic parent-child relationships.
The parent has most likely maneuvered their manipulation so that the child will always remain guilty and feel as though they owe them something.
This is when the child unknowingly or knowingly enables the parent’s addiction, immaturity, and irresponsibility.