Fixing a broken relationship is not worth fighting for. Toxic people are the reason for relationships failing, not you!
Love comes in many forms, but toxic love is easily one of the most preserves forms of love.
Broken relationships fail for a myriad of reasons, with these reasons being, but not limited to:
- The partner being a kidult (They want you to be their parent and their partner)
- The toxic partner has a lot of baggage and they are looking to throw all of it on to you
- Drama is their daily medicine, without it, they do not know how to function
- The break up and make up game is never going to stop because it is a game to them
- Your pain is their pleasure
There are many articles out there that show you how you can fix a broken relationship, but there are many justifiable reasons for you not to try and fix something you didn’t break.
No relationship is perfect.
There are ups and downs.
This is a truth to all relationships.
But you find yourself always, time and time again, breaking up to make up, arguing over the silliest of things, be threatened by divorce time and time also ~ stop trying to fix that broken relationship and move on.
In this article, I want to discuss eight reasons why you should not try to fix a broken relationship.
If it is one thing I have learned from how to mend a broken relationship is this, if you didn’t break, don’t try and fix it.
- 1 8 Reasons Why You Should Not Fix A Broken Relationship
- 1.1 1 – Time Cannot Be Given Back
- 1.2 2 – You Lose Who You Are
- 1.3 3 – You Don’t Have A Partner, You Have A Covert Enemy In Your Life
- 1.4 4 – Compromising Will Not Change A D*mn Thing
- 1.5 5 – Would You Want Your Child To Fight For Someone’s Love Like You Do?
- 1.6 6 – The Energy You Use To Fight To Make Them Happy Can Be Fed To You
- 1.7 7 – You Don’t Need To Suffer
- 1.8 8 – Listen! You Do Not Need Closure
8 Reasons Why You Should Not Fix A Broken Relationship
1 – Time Cannot Be Given Back
I find nothing more heartbreaking than to hear stories of people staying in a narcissistic toxic relationship for not months, years, but DECADES of their lives trying to make that toxic relationship work.
Nothing is more damaging to one’s life but to lose so much of it trying to make someone who will never be happy; happy.
Narcissistic people and toxic people, in general, suck the good out of people.
They suck the joy, happiness, beauty, dreams, and goals of people and feed on them like parasites.
I read an interesting article that had compared narcissistic people to parasites.
And I find that to be a good analogy.
These people have an insatiable desire to feed off of others, and they will do this to the point of draining that person of all they have and then move on to someone else.
This is crushing because a person loses their lives, youth, and years for someone who doesn’t care about them.
The time that one loses can never be given back, and that is crushing on a massive level.
2 – You Lose Who You Are
Life is a journey of discovering who we are, but in a toxic, broken relationship, who we are can be lost and, sadly for some, never found again.
Losing who we are is not uncommon in these types of relationships.
And sadly, many articles and people are championing this ludicrous idea that “you have to stick things out and make it work.”
How can you ever have a healthy relationship with someone when you no longer know who you are?
Losing yourself is never okay as you become nothing more than a puppet for those who seek to control you.
When you know who you are, you have a clear sense of knowing what you want in your life and what you want to do with your life.
The idea of losing yourself, as so many people have done and continue to do, is that they become nothing more than puppets to the toxic partner.
And the toxic partner usually spends their time positioning their partner in situations that would hurt them.
Love is not blinding; it is revealing.
A partner is not supposed to blind you to who you are but to reveal what you can become.
This is a hallmark of a healthy relationship, growing, becoming better, and continually improving because you have a PARTNER by your side.
3 – You Don’t Have A Partner, You Have A Covert Enemy In Your Life
The world is full of a lot of nasty people, and some people only befriend you so that they can learn how to hurt you.
Their “love” and their desire to want to get back together with you are just tactics to get into your life to hurt you once again.
Love is not about tearing down one another; it is about building up one another.
If you find that you are being torn downtime and time again, then why stay?
There are plenty of people out there who will love you and champion your dreams and goals.
4 – Compromising Will Not Change A D*mn Thing
Nothing irks me more than this phrase, “You gotta compromise.”
The issue with this phrase and the underlining message is that you have to continue giving up small bits of who you are.
And for what?
Small amounts of respect?
The greatest respect we can ever have in life is self-respect.
And when you compromise, what you say to them is, “Here you go! Here is a bit more of myself that you can feed on and mold into what you want. I am not good enough the way that I am, but you can make me good enough.”
If we are not good enough for them, NO ONE IS CHAINING THEM TO US.
It would help if you never compromised on your principles or who you are for someone who will never do that for you.
5 – Would You Want Your Child To Fight For Someone’s Love Like You Do?
Think about it.
Think about it for a second.
Visualize your child in your situation.
Think about them being in a relationship with a person who belittles them, demeans them, tears them down, yells at them, and makes them feel less than.
Would you want your child trying to fix a broken relationship like that?
If you said, “No,” then why are you doing it?
6 – The Energy You Use To Fight To Make Them Happy Can Be Fed To You
The time and energy you use to make them happy can be spent on making yourself happy.
This is not selfish of you.
This is self-full!
Why must you sacrifice your ONE LIFE for someone who only wants to waste your life and destroy your life?
What do you gain from that?
You matter in this world, and you must start saying this to yourself.
Previous relationships may have broken the partner in your life, but that is NOT YOUR FAULT.
And you have to stop trying to fix what you didn’t break.
7 – You Don’t Need To Suffer
Life is already suffering, why the heck add to it?
8 – Listen! You Do Not Need Closure
They may broken you, shattered you, hurt you, humiliate you, abused you, stole from you, destroyed you…but closure from these people will never come.
I know for many of us who may have been in a broken relationship that we believe that the closure will help us heal.
And we try and fix these relationships because we believe that if we can get them to understand what they did to us, they would change and make things better.
Dear hearts out there…this most likely will not happen.
Their empty promises of them changing and being a better person are only statement to keep you in their broken lives.
I know it is not easy, but stop seeking closure.
Stop trying to fix a broken relationship.
And stop wasting your time and life on people who do not care about you.
Your life, more than anyone else in this world, MATTERS.
Please stop trying to fix them and start working on yourself.